Maya

Maya!!

No.. She's not an illusion. None at all. 

But, the idea that you can own her, sure is. 

She is like a firefly. She'll light up into a flame and attract you. And you'd catch her, perhaps. But don't think she'll glow at your whim. She owns her spark and you can never grab it. 

Not between your lips, or fingers or palms.

You may wonder, why doesn't she talk; and sometimes she's full of stories. It is annoying, intriguing, senseless. All at the same time... 

She wants more and more of everything on certain days and on some days she is as benevolent as the grace of God - so giving!

She can let go easily and not ponder over things that tear you apart. 

She'll instead whine over trivial matters. 

She'll hold you when you are weakest and not hold you at all when you are worse. Not because she cares less. 

It's because she needs to hold her self together. 

A broken hook cannot hold a mantle. 

She breaks and remains broken. 
Until she's ready to be whole again. Sometimes, she tries to make things alright. 

She tries to proves that she's done it before, but most of the times she's just gotten accustomed. 

Most of the times, she remains who she is. And you should let her be. 

She may be a mystery, but she's real. Don't make her a figment of your imagination. She's not an illusion. She's a real person. 

But let go of your ideas about her. Those are illusions- Dangerous ones!!!

Zuri

Zuri, 

Envy. Envy is bad. But it is genuine. 

You know what's better than envy - hate. 

Because there is no dilution in that emotion. And you, my love, feel that you are far from love because of the milligrams of hate you harness in tiny corners of your heart. Every human does!

I know he left you crying. I know your friends don't get you. You have no friends whatsoever, but you exist. And believe me, if you exist with a little love, life would be so different. 

Do you believe in magic? Do you want to see it? 

Love people despite the hurt and see what happens to their eyes. 

Dance and tell. Write and tell. Sing and tell. But, express. I know you can't. The hurt is too overpowering. You believe that no one deserves your grace. 

But you do, sweetheart!!

In loving others you will discover yourself again. Forgive the annoying little habits of people. Forgive all those who have taken joy away from you. Forgive those who have betrayed and those who have left you because of your incompleteness. 

It's difficult to complete others when they are not complete themselves. 

You are. 

Forgive yourself and love. 

Love like you are a magician, born to turn every wailing face into a smiling one. Let the spark in you ignite one more time and pass on your light to the people around you. Enough of this hate. 

When you keep love to yourself, it never grows. So is the case with hurt. 

Stop wherever you are and breathe. 

Live the moment and feel the love. 

You are now the light bearer, Zuri. You don't know it. Don't pretend that you are cold with remorse, whereas you are an entity of love. Go forth and be yourself. 

You are not enveloped by sadness or pessimism, they are just illusions. 

Love oozes out of cracks and you are full of them. 

Let it flow, like a stream, a never ending stream and let all those who've let you down know, that you have gotten back up and forgiven them. 

There is nothing more powerful than forgiveness. 

Let go. 

Ray-n

Rayn,

How you burst into fits of laughter while tears trickle down your cheeks. 
Your lashes hug each other like they were separated for ages - insomniac, dreaming with eyes wide open!

You hide your face as if the monsoons are hitting you hard, but my love, you are Rayn!

Pour down, like an endless drizzle, or a thunderstorm and laugh your heart out. Do not hide the freckles that redden up or your crooked teeth that twist your lips. 

Don't bother about how you look. 

You are beautiful, you needn't look so. Because you already ARE. 

Live like you will never live again and embrace the tiny bits of happiness that come your way, even when you are picking up broken pieces of yourself. 

There is wit and humor all around. You have a lot within you, let the happiness pour out and hold that sadness in your palms. Open it and let it go every time you are tempted to laugh. 

Let people think you've lost it. Let people question your sanity. 
Everyone out there is insane; fighting an unknown battle and crying over it.

But you laugh. Laugh, my dear like you will never laugh again, and let the giggles echo in the hollows of the universe. Let each organism know what it feels like to vibrate in optimism despite sheer agony. Laugh. 
And pour down, love. Whenever you want, as much as you want!

My darling, Rayn. 

Brontide

Picture Location: SRCM Retreat Centre, Panshet

The clouds were murmuring in what seemed like a thunder.

The downpour had just shown us a prelude,

Of what lay ahead.

While talking on the phone, people appeared to convey to their loved ones that they will be passing through a storm, perhaps. And they might reach their destinations a tad late. 

There seemed to be a tenderness about the communication. Eyes moist, no smiles, as if the silent rustle was warning the humans of an impending doom. 

I stood there, looking at nature in its alluring synchronicity, both living and non-living entities reacting to the brontide. 

I realized, sometimes, what you hear, see, feel and know, are in different dimensions. 

You cannot put them together to make sense out of it. Perhaps a thunder somewhere is actually a rocket taking off from a space station. Or a huge truck unloading rocks on a construction site. The vision gets clouded automatically as the senses start working in tandem leading to a beautiful illusion, or sometimes painful.

But, I have been through many such illusions and I chose to stay still in both calm and storm. 

The residuum is a wonderful thing to observe. It's me, left with rasping dichotomy. 

And I undo it one by one, learning nature all over again.

The Contrast!

Look at this picture!

Picture Taken in Paris, France, near Notre Dam

What do you see?

The little girl playing merrily with the sparrows? Unmindful, fearless, happy, naive, welcoming!?

Have you done anything like this in your life?
Of course, you must have. We have been carefree, outgoing, not worrying about the repercussions of indulging in little pleasures. 

We have played with people, friends, things, animals our parents warned us against. We have climbed roofs and yelled at the top of our voices?

We have been children, enjoying life insouciantly!

What has changed now? Why do we not do this anymore? Societal rules, norms? Fear of being judged? Fear of masks falling off?

What do you think is the old man doing? Can you picture yourself in the place of the old man? 

Can you gauge his expressions? What must he be thinking? What could be his life story?

This beautiful contrast depicts two extremes of our life! What we make of it in between is all that matters!!

“If you were a bird, and lived on high,

You'd lean on the wind when the wind came by,

You'd say to the wind when it took you away:

"That's where I wanted to go today!” 

― A.A. Milne, When We Were Very Young

Have you ever been on a date with yourself?

Try it!

Excerpt from Love in the time of  Cholera :