Reader's Block

I know it's temporary! Just a few days back I ranted about how I was so much into reading, and I read more than half a dozen of books! And it was a nice feeling, you know! It's good to have someone else, apart from your ego blabber inside your mind. I had the authors tell me nice stories and things, which made me sway away to distant lands of dreams and imagination, afar from all the hustle and bustle of the city and commotion of the people around.

I was having a nice time with books! But I think I spoke too much, that's the reason why it got jinxed! I am not able to read anything. Oh no! everything's perfect with my eyes, and my pair of specs, but this is just something which I cannot understand. I just cannot read! I am not able to grasp anything, ANYTHING. And, it is astounding. Because books used to be my source of solace!

Well, now that I am writing about it, I think I know what caused it! I started off with "One Hundred Years of Solitude" by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. It was an ebook. I scrolled pages after pages, reading the words and making sense of the foreign names which I couldn't pronounce. After flipping more than 15 pages, I realised, I hadn't grasped the plot yet! I felt horrible. I did not wanted to go back and catchup with the lost part, because I realised, I 'd have to begin reading all over again!

I appreicate the book. Really. It is one of the must-read novels and people have given some amazing feedback about it. But to me it is sheer Greek. I don't understand it! Such a high level of writing is something which is not my cup of tea!

Whenever I write poems, absurd, weird, abstract ones, I have people tell me how beautiful I've written. I thank them. But when I go back and read them after 2 years or so, it makes no sense to me. I wonder, how did people understand what I wrote, and what was I really thinking when I did that. The fact is, only I would have understood what it meant, if I were in that frame of mind, and of course at that point of time it would have been beautiful. But with time, it probably becomes obsolete!

Same is the case with novels like these. They are perhaps written in the 19th century or later, in a particular setup - say war or crisis, and at that time, perhaps, it would have made a lot of sense. Or rather, the people of that particular nation would still be able to extract some sense out of it, but I would never be able to do that!

Give me anything to read on history of India, I would eagerly read it, but a foreign writer describing something in his local setup rarely makes sense.

The book is well acclaimed, but I find it unreadable. With due respect to the writer and the readers who have found that book interesting, I'd say, I have lost the urge to read anything after reading "One hundred years of solitude".

When I try to read "What young india wants" by Chetan Bhagat, I feel weird too. I don't blame it on CB. I blame it on the previous read! It's like tasting a weird syrup, and then trying to drink coke. The former's taste still persists! You don't enjoy it anymore and end up hating coke too!

So for time being, I think it's reader's block!

I think by the time I overcome the reader's block, I should cash on the writer's unblock! :D

The Facebook Fad

I admit, I am addicted to FB. I visit the page every 10 minutes not to see what people have said about my updates, but I just go there to see where the world and the people are heading. I have a nice laugh at times, and at times, I am simply convinced about the stupidity of people.

I do have things that go in my mind, and when  I open FB,  "What's on your mind?" tempts me to write it down there. Further more, if people like my status and comment back, I get updates on my mail and cell and I go back and see what they've said, and most of the times I have some totally un-understandable things like "supalyk". I feel stupid at times for behaving like other attention seekers who put a status for no good reason and more stupid for having someone write weird comments for my updates!

Ok, what's the deal with this "supalyk" ? Spell it well, honeybunches. I understand, sometimes, hitting the 'like' button isn't enough. You feel like expressing it more. And instead of using adjectives, you simply make it "super"lative. Therefore, the effort you put in saving your effort is pretty evident. I'd accept "Superlike" more affirmatively, but why do you go about misspelling it purposely? Supa lyk? Weren't you taught the right way to spell words?

Well, I know things are changing, but who is the person who is changing the way words are spelt? I guess no one! Sometimes I wish there indeed was a dislike button, where I could go on "Supadislyking" the dirty comments which has all misspelt words.

This texting culture sucks. "Chk out ma niu pair of glasses" :D LOL...seriously???

Now, this ROFL, LOL and LMAO are also so much fun. So much fun, that every thing is being shortened. For example - "ty". That too in small letters. I wonder, if you want to thank someone, be truly courteous and say a Thank You the way it should be said. And then people reply back saying "wc". It almost reads between the lines as "dare you come. I really don't mean the 'welcome'".

What's wrong with people? Sometimes, I feel like commenting my heart out on certain statuses. But I simply control my urge and end up just liking the comment. Or at times not liking anything at all.

The other day, I browsed through FB and saw these statuses :

"You may not love me, but I love you" 

My mind: Ok! you can text this message to the person concerned! or is it applicable to all of us?? So generous of you!

"Mere mann ye bata de tu... kis or chala hai tu?"
My mind: Facebook answers that??  or will your Mann answer it here? Or are you simply singing out too loud!

***

"Going home..yippee"
My mind: Ok :/

"Having Pizza"
My mind: Ok :/

"Enjoying with my parents"
My mind: Ok :/

"Had a long drive with my love"
My Mind: Ok :/

What is expected out of these updates? A replying saying "ooohh.. am jealous!" ??

***

"Look into my eyes...you'll see ... what you mean to me"
My mind: wtf! he thinks he's bryan adams!

"Addicted"
My Mind: wtf! he thinks...

"Comfortably numb"
My Mind: wtf!

"Backstreet Boys"
My Mind: w!

***

"Down with fever cough and cold"
My mind: do we have an online FB clinic? tell your doc about it.. duh!

"Sick of these people"
My Mind: ok :/

"Bad day work"
My Mind: ok :/

and I have the same response to all of 'em!

Everyone's either complaining or Facebook or sharing someone else's quote, or writing something so weird which makes no sense to anyone, not even to them!

And there are these crazy poster thing going on on FB these days - "Admit you've done this when you were a kid"

Well, I don't wanna admit anything! Is any online sin-confession thing going on here. I don't want to tell what I did as a kid, especially in public. Just share things if you wanna, but don't force it on me. If I agree and realise, "yeah, that makes sense", I would anyway admit it and put a comment saying that.

Then there are these posters about dealing with heart breaks which are put by people who are indeed undergoing one. Then the insecure individuals put up message posters like "The real beauty is the inner beauty, and the guy who doesn't appreciate that is a fool" etc etc. The more gyan you share on FB, the more evident your insecurity is! It's like, people are living their life in open. Everyone knows what's going on in the other person's life.

I know a lot of people, not because of who they really are, but what activity they do on FB. 

The conversations sadly begin with, "Hey, I saw on FB. You got engaged! eh? Congrats!"

I have no clue where the world is heading. It's a sad state. And worst part is, I am essentially a forerunner in all this stupidity.

It's a shame, when we have to peek into other's privacy, worst when others make their life a joke by sharing every itsy bitsy tale.

It's a shame to let the other person know your virtual laughter in the form of LOL and ROFL, where you actually give a damn and don't even really smile.

It's a shame that you like others' status so that you expect more hits on yours.

It's a shame when you plunge into the virtual world to seek sadistic pleasure when others talk about their pain.

It's a shame that people share their pain online!

It's a shame that FB is becoming an online - bitching centre and means of extending the grapevine.

It's a shame that people are sharing their lives with strangers instead of sharing it with their folks.

It really is a shame!

Social networking tools are greatly misused. I am one of those who does it. And Shame on me too.

It's high time, the craze is shifted to something more lucrative and interesting.

The Story of an Engineer

I have a life, but people think I don't

They ask me to explain, but I really won't

My family thrives not simply, they enjoy

I earn for my beloved and two lovely boys



How does that happen, you may think?

I work so hard, my schedule stinks

I live my passion and work till nine

I am an Engineer, working just so fine



I make money I live my dreams

That explains all the desserts and ice creams

And also the matching curtains that change every year

And a posh, fully loaded - cruiser



I love my job, it defines me

I don't care what others see

I may look bugged, but I am at peace

Life's like a Burger with Mayonnaise and cheese



But one day'll come when I'll take the break

Sit back and ponder over my victories and mistakes

I'd have a peaceful heart for the efforts put

and retire from everything, if I should



With time calling me in its arms

I will have to fall for its charm

And that day I'd refuse to work till nine

I won't be dead, I 'd just be offline!

Letter to Evelyn

My Dearest,

Aunt is sorry for being so late
She was busy dealing with her fate
Things were dicey and boring too
So she couldn't write anything to you

But you turned 1 on a fine August day
I know it's pretty late to say
But still I'd wish you all the joy and fun
you'll see what a lovely thing it is to be ONE

And mommy told me how fast you grow
Every day one new thing you show
By catching up the words so quick
And displaying some naughty cute old tricks

I heard you've started walking
dancing, hopping and talking
You speak a lot, just words don't seem right
Don't worry girl, they'll soon be easy and bright

And then perhaps, you can talk to me
and we'll discuss little plans, you see
of going to a funfare and park
and those two friends of yours, you may ask

But do you eat well, or have some whims?
Do you trouble mommy and then give that grin?
You should eat really well, and become strong
and then when I go skiing, you can tag along

Thanks for the message the other day (aqwwwaw11!1)
I had no clue what you wanted to say
But still I thought I'd reply to you
So that you have no complaints that I didn't do.

I'll see you soon baby, sometime in Jan
I'll get you as many pretty dolls as I can
and then we'll play, and also go to the zoo
You should know darling, I so miss you!

Love,
Aunt Mini :)

Those times when..

It's been a long time when I had "those times" when I derived philosophies out of a simple situation.

But lessons or no lessons, I always exclaim "Aisa Bhi Hota hai???"

I was super hungry and I went to my office canteen for some snacks and tea. The canteen fellow has been innovating every day, so the other day the menu was this:

I wondered whether I should have ALU BODA or CYAPSIGAM BAJJI. Well, it's Bangalore and people like to innovate at this level "specaelly". It took me a while to understand that the menu had Capsicum Bhajiyas and while someone enlightened me on that fact, I laughed hard, so hard, that I lost my hunger and interest both and simply planned to blog about this by making stories. But here, I didn't make any. I just put the incident as it was. Honestly! :D

***

On another day, during office hours we sneaked out to buy a scratch guard for my friend's phone. It was apparently "Made in Chian" - the pic is not super clear though!

I laughed out loud yet again at the idiosyncracies of life and foolishness of human beings! this
The entire day I kept humming this song --> Oh mere Dil ke Chian... Chian aaye mere dil ko dua kijiye :D

***

Whatsapp is a great application. It helps me stay connected with a few of my folks who make me super happy all the time. From the school gang, to ex-roomies and my first-job group of friends - the CB2. We all are a crazy lot. I don't know how much value this app adds to their life, but for me, Whatsapp is so far one of the best thing that has happened to me. Talk about being virtually addicted! I think one can't do much when distances play a vital role.

***

I have not been super regular at blogging and  I regret it. My laptop is becoming lazier than me. It misbehaves at times, and I spank it out of sheer frustration . It has stopped responding properly. Therefore, blogging is a pain, more than a pleasure now. I wish I had other sources too - say a tab, or internet connection at work!

I wish somebody could grab a tab for me in the thanksgiving sale this year.. I'll Pay.. Ahm.. is anyone listening? :P

***

Maloo, my ex-roommate is now a great artist. Here are some of her priceless creations. I am planning to auction them after I become the most famous lady in the world :D

Copyright : Maloo

Copyright : Maloo

***

After a lot of efforts I finally have the telugu version of Makkhi (Eega) with me now. I was so curious to know what is it about. It is being talked about all over in Bangalore. I thought I better give it a shot. Will come back with a review soon!

***

Bangalore is getting better day by day. The weather is returning to the ancient Bangalore mode, and it is nice and cloudy and cool all the time. I love this weather!

***

Right now I am reading "The Saint the surfer and the CEO - Robin Sharma". Poor writing, but great great content. Please pick up this book ! :)

***

Can't wait to start with "The American Gods - Neil Gaiman". I just kept it for my train journey. I will be travelling in the train after a very long time. I am sooo excited!

***

 Ignore the title of the post. There is actually no link :D

Path to Heaven

Picture Courtesy: © Diba Raza

The low hung trees

and the pretty flowers on the path,

Remind me of the wondrous roads to Heaven

When I'd sit on the porch, tired,

Dissolve in the essence of tea,

and relive a story.

A story of a prince who'd,

someday walk on the same path.

and take me with him.

These distinct flowers

seem familiar when I close my eyes.

and remember the good old days.

When mom would sweep the dried petals,

and I'd wait again until,

the low hung trees.....

and the pretty flowers

made another path, 

to the home, where I lived until....

He came and took me to his Kingdom

They have trees too, low hung..

But the flowers aren't so pretty!

Reading Spree

When your best friend is sitting in the other part of the globe, sipping Americano with hot Chinese girls, what do you do? You make new friends. Well, I've always had a backup-best-friend, in case the first one went, you know, astray :P

Ok, I am talking about books. I have read, like, 5-6 books in 2 months and I couldn't have felt any better! I started off with Palace of Illusions which is based on Draupadi's life, and it is her story told in first person. I loved the way Mahabharata was explained vis-a-vis her perspective. I think it a strongly feminist book with a deep insight into the actual war and relationship of Panchali with the Pandavas. At times you happen to sympathise with the narrator and feel how weird the customs and principles were back then. But everything happened for a reason, and we now know it as the great Epic of Mahabharata.

The next book was "Eat Pray Love". I wouldn't say, it was a great great writing or a fantastic book which inspired me, but I'd say it was one the books which I lived as I read it. I travelled to all the places the writer took me along with her and I was ecstatic about her experiences. I've always loved autobiographies, especially of people who are lesser known (to me). I'd like to go back and re-read this one very soon. At more levels than one, it is ME. I loved the book. A must read for wandering souls like me, who are in search of something - could be a purpose, a lover, a master, a hobby, a profession, or any darn thing. Lovely book!

Then I grabbed an ebook called Megaliving by Robin Sharma. I was averse to any self help books, because I always thought I was the most sane person ever. But sanity goes for a toss at times, and the universe so conspires that it hands you a book that helps you rediscover yourself. That's how Megaliving happened and I loved it immensely. It's one of those books which promises you a better life if you are willing to put in efforts. I did, and it turned out great for me! Please get a copy of this one. You may not need it now, but this is something which you may need any moment.

Inspired by Robin Sharma, I was in the flow of philosophy and pyschology, so I re-read this book by Anupam Kher called "The best thing about you is you". It is one of those books which tells you all that you need to know about yourself, your hidden potentials and the immense possibilities for self improvement. I had read it when I wasn't in a mood, but still did it because I'd started it. But this time when I read it, it made a lot of sense.

Then, I finally finished a long pending read "The good man Jesus and the scoundrel Christ". This is a fiction. There is nothing deeply related to Christianity, but based more on the belief that has been passed on, the way the Father is worshipped. I wouldn't comment on this book, because of religious sentiments, but when read in the correct sense, it enriches you in a lot of ways.


Then came the sexiest read of all times- 50 Shades of Grey. I have never hated any plot so much and at the same time loved the writing as much as I did in this novel. The writing is candid, effortless, slow, painfully sensuous and erotic. But the plot is a little weird, because we, as Indians are not exposed to such a culture of expression. Nonetheless, anything related to weird psychological cases intrigue me. It's a trilogy, and I am not sure whether I want to pick up another book. But going forward, I'd definitely like to know the end to this tale.

While I am contemplating the idea of picking up the Part 2 of this Grey series, I am hooked on to "The Krishna Key" - by Ashwin Sanghi. This time, the writing is poor. But the plot is gripping. Anything that reveals secrets about mythology and history always excites me. So I think I will be done with this one pretty soon. A good 2 hours at the airport is enough to wrap up such a fast paced read. I'd suggest, all those who loved Chanakya Chant and Rozabal Line, should pick this one up too. Though it's not as clean as the former, it still is a good read!

It's very difficult for me to say bad things about any book. I anyway grasp something or the other from each book.

The last book that I started was "The Accidental Godman", but I couldn't finish it. It was a little draggy. I will continue with that after a roller coaster on The Krishna Key.

That's how my reading has been going on. A variety in genres and different levels of understanding.

What have y'all been upto? :)

Coming back home

Sometimes in life you go after many things. I did too. I kept on hitting dead end.. Also, whenever there is a distraction, there happens to be a deviation from the basics. Getting away from blogging, from the life that originally was, in search of something in the parallel universe, just happened to give me an experience which I think I wouldn't have wanted. But I embrace it anyway. 

A lot of things happened. All happy stuff! :) But I sought another refuge and expressed in some other medium. But I realized  somethings are better off they way they were meant to be. Like, a poem is supposed to be in a rhyme, a story - in words. But I was trying to find other ways of expressions. Seems, I ain't very good at anything but ranting stuff on "An Obscure Optimist". I keep reassuring myself about the obscurity that surrounds me and the optimism that creeps out eventually. But all these days, I failed to express.

I am home this time, and I find it heartwarming as the roads of Nagpur, drenched, yell out a welcome and ask me to relish this wonderful treat. I have missed it all these days. There were times when I was in Nagpur, but I used to traverse just one path. That path made me hit a dead end a number of times, but I still kept on banging my head there. This time, I took a different route. The roads were familiar, yet unfamiliar in their own way, like they were telling me their grudges, expressing how much they missed me. I missed them too. We conversed, and seems the familiarity is bouncing back.

I was devoid of the pleasures of walking on the streets because of being engrossed in useless things and allowing the advance means of commutation to take me to "nowhere". Now I am back from there. It's a time to move on, walk down the memory lanes again.

I miss my dear friend with whom I shared wonderful evenings. It's home in more ways than one. I have a few more days of stay here, and I can feel the pain of departure already. Something keeps telling me that one day everything will be alright and I will be back home.

This feeling keeps me going. I shall leave in a few days, only to come back, and be the same old day dreamer who loved each and every street of the city that led her to her happy place!

To that happy place, I shall come back! :)